As clients become able to do so the new objects of orientation often become more defined and & Goodman 1951). Rather, it is a means to help them observe, firsthand, how their chronic orienting tendencies toward reminders of the past recreate the trauma-related experience of danger and powerlessness, whereas choosing to orient to a good feeling can result in an experience of safety and mastery. “This reorienting is not an attempt to avoid or discount clients' pain and ongoing suffering. The Couple Who Became Each Other: Stories of Healing and Transformation from a Leading Hypnotherapist They live just outside of consciousness like noisy neighbors who bang on the pipes and occasionally show up at the door.” They intrude in unexpected ways: through panic attacks and insomnia, through dreams and artwork, through seemingly inexplicable compulsions, and through the shadowy dread of the abusive parent. But while the knowledge, body sensations, and feelings are shattered, they are not forgotten. Rationalizations like "my childhood was rough," "he only did it to me once or twice," and "it wasn't so bad" are common, masking the fact that the abuse was devastating and chronic. So they fragment the memories into hundreds of shards, leaving only acceptable traces in their conscious minds. They have to: it's too painful to believe that their parents would do such a thing. Almost always, they deny or minimize the abusive memories. “Carla's description was typical of survivors of chronic childhood abuse.
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